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Friday Fails For February 1st

Here’s A Diaper Some People Might Want To Sniff

Two women coming back from New York from the Dominican Republic were arrested at the JFK airport for wearing “diapers” stuffed with cocaine.  They didn’t make it past the drug-sniffing dogs who detected something suspicious.  The luggage was clean but the diapers were discovered during the pat down. (New York Post)

Give Me Olive Your Money Fool!

Drugs make you do funny things.  Fight over drugs and can be even more ridiculous.  In Athens Georgia a man and women were fighting over money AND drugs.   So what happened?  Well, 49-year-old Tammie Elaine Johnson too a jar of olives and smashed it over the man’s head.  Police found him bleeding with a cut over his eye and charged Johnson with aggravated assault.  Terrible waste of olives if you asked me.  (AP)

Man Breaks Out Of Jail To Have A Beer

Authorities in Burgettstown, Pennsylvania said a man who escaped from his holding cell stopped at a bar, told a bar-goer that he just broke out of jail then asked for a beer. Police said 40-year-old Timothy Bonner had just been un-cuffed and placed in a jail cell when he knocked the door off of its hinges and ran away. Minutes later, he stopped at Richy’s Bar and admitted to breaking out and asked for a beer. The customer said he did buy him a beer but the police showed up before Bonner could drink it. (AP)

Get A Job Ya Lazy Bum, I Don’t Care If You’re 12 Years Old

A judge in Massachusetts ordered a 12-year-old tagger with juvenile delinquency charges to get a job to pay $1,000 restitution to his neighbors in East Hampton. The boy was 11 at the time of his crime and given one year to pay his neighbors in exchange for having the charges put off. When the boy failed to pay within the year, the judge extended his probation for four years and ordered the kid to get a job. The judge explained that the boy can earn money “by obtaining a paper route, mowing lawns, raking leaves, shoveling snow, baby-sitting, delivering groceries or, by recycling items upon which a deposit had been paid.” (Boston Globe)

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