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Why “Virgin” Jello Shots Are The Worst

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Jello shots are awesome. They’re portable and tasty, but they’re no good without booze. 

I was recently at a bachelorette party where there was an entire rolling cooler full of jello shots. Jello of every flavor was available. They had the entire rainbow in there and I am sure that if the Coleman company could see what these women did with their cooler, they would weep tears of joy. In another cooler was a pile of chocolate pudding shots made with RumChata.

As they were doling them out, I was told, “We made some for you, too with no alcohol.” I’m not a big drinker and I had to drive later, so they made me “virgin” shots. It was basically a small cup with just jello in it made the old fashioned way with no vodka. I just smiled and said “Thanks.”

I guess it really didn’t matter to them at the end of the night because everyone was too drunk to remember, but I knew where my keys and wallet were and I didn’t have to worry about how I was getting home the next morning.

The moral of the story is, when making two coolers full of jello and pudding shots and you know someone who doesn’t drink is coming to the party, just don’t make any. I get the sentiment, but I’d really rather just go without. I’m glad you invited me to the party and you want me to feel included, but I’ll just stick to my diet ginger ale.

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